911, I need my friends back!

Hello there one more time.
Yesterday, when I decided that blogging might be another way to pass my time, I was briefly reading through Jenn's blog (it felt like a brief read because most of her posts are one sentence post, lets you create your own thoughts, haha), anyway, I came to one that she had wrote last year, few days before 2012, toasting the year-end to our great friendship among our friends. She started the post by mentioning how VERY different we all are, in terms of character, personality, genetically, etc. Indeed, I cannot agree more. Which had made me think, what would all of us be like, if we weren't friends with each other; to not have all the opposites of one another to keep a balance in our extremities (but I'd also say that because we are friends with each other, our extremities goes out of balance sometimes, because our friends really accept for what a whack we are, or I am).

First up -

Jennifer. I've mentioned this again and again many times. If Jenn, not for all the loud and obnoxious us she have around her, she'd be one hell of a nerdy, long girl playing chest by the corner of the classroom. Probably like the tall skinny version of Ugly Betty, ya, no? Trust me. She could have had a great career playing badminton and chest, instead of netball. I bet if she had not fallen in love with us, she would have all the same looking friends surrounding her now; reading novels in Lake Garden while she plays her guitar, they talk about serious stuffs, and plan their future way head ahead. I am so tempted to mention names of some people that would have ended up her friends, but it is really not nice to mention names. Haha. Let me know if you disagree.

Tan Mizen. There is clearly no denying, if it wasn't for us, I wouldn't say cool, at all, haha, people, this is what will be of Tan Mizen, let the picture say it all -

We definitely made a very helpful influence on her. Hahaha. Oh my, the photo really cracks me up. (: Her and all her lala friends. Drawing anime, wearing funky florescent clothes!!! 

Cheah. It is krazy how I'd imagine her to be in it weren't for us. I bet no one sees it coming. I totally see her as this neighbourhood gangsta lovin'. The one that if she'd walk out of the house, she'd think that everyone would pause a breath. She'd probably be a good friend of Mizen; like you know how lala girls always have this one or two awkward gangsta looking female friends. Hahahaha. 

Beh Shuh Pyng. She would be the most indifferent style you'd see. Still being driven around by her mother. A total badass that is still driven by the father. Don't get me wrong, she turns out to be quite a badass, but sure enough, our undying support and encouragement had let her retain her badassness WITH a driver's license. *wink*. Yes? She would totally be fit to be a child bully, you know, bullying those kids who come by to her restaurant. Asking them for more money than what they bought. Totally. Nasty-ass.

Tan Ezen. For her part, if it wasn't for us to help keep her youthfulness, to have friends who feed her krazy side, doing things she'd never imagined she'd ever do at her age. If not for us, Ezen -

Cheng Txin. Continues to be like the person I first saw her on the first day of class in 1K1. I wish I have a picture of that one! Eating popcorns while teaching her tuition classes. 

I am not going to try to mention everyone here because I don't think I want to hurt so many people's feelings with my honest opinion. Also, I don't want to end up having a nightmare of all my friends being who I wrote them to be.

But though, my friends absolutely and definitely kept my insanity in control and my sanity in check. No words can come close to describe how our different persons has touch the lives of one another, how we learnt from each other's views, opinions and practices. How much I learnt of love through the sincerity of my friends. I am forever thankful, for how much they tolerate my nonsense - this post for example. If I had bitchy people for friends, I bet this blog post would be a break up post. Haha. 

Without Jennifer, I'd never be able to learn how delicious a pineapple tart can be. 

Without Tan Mizen, I'd never be able to learn that mushroom can be a hairstyle.

Without Cheah, I'd never be able to experience not sleeping for more than 24 hours and going hiking the morning after. 

Without Beh Shuh Pyng, I'd never have met someone who had to take driving license for record breaking times and never would have been able to taste the best wantan mee in the world!

Without Tan Ezen, I'd not have someone who'd be able to entertain me about kebahagiaan 24/7.

Without Cheng Txin, I'd never have been able to ride on a motorcycle racing a car!

I love you all. 

And I hope everyone had had a wonderful iced coffee day. 

Change is what good.

Ah wow. Wow. I am here because I am bored to my core, my deepest deepest core of desperation. At the same time, being bored means having no one to talk to about my philosophical ways of thoughts. Logging in to this blog, so much has changed, it literally took me more than a minute to find my way to my main page. I remember those days when I used to read blogs a whole lot, always very entertained by fellow friend, Ily, always wacky; and always urging on my friends to update their blog so I'd have something to read - so much has changed since.

This is one sad pathetic Jane writing the words to this blog. I hate to say, you know, I know, we all know, this is one suckiest summer feeding to my suicidal self. The highest point of sadness and sorrow lies in this summer, something that may haunt me for quite awhile; but I would be wrong to not say that it did trail with a deem of joy.

For this sacrifice I took to let go this summer for home, it came with the biggest price ever. It did not slip my mind initially when I said to myself, maybe, maybe, I'd survive this summer drought - sure enough, life is a gamble, it is a risk-taking s.o.b. And because it is me, because it is me, life sure smack me in the face just when I allowed myself to take the gamble. Life is not fair. Losing my granma was immense; to feel the feel of true anger, frustration and so much anger, towards myself, towards them - who will never understand me.

I was doing some dishes just right before I came stumbling to write a blog. Looking out the window as I was scrubbing them dishes, I had thought about the impossibilities of how people always say that, one chapter is closed and another opens, I don't think life works that way. Chapters of life does not open and close, at least not easy, not at all. I picture my life, in the final ending, I have chapters and chapters left wide open; even if I had moved to live on the 29th chapter, 28 chapters would be opened. If one is open and one is closed, how do we ever get rich in our lives? We need every chapter we ever gained, and that's how ones life would be enriched - with all the beautiful people - my awesome friends with uncanny niceness and tolerance for me. I miss you all.

As for me, I am gonna take my time to open new chapters, I am well and fine living off the old ones. Like this quote, I've taken as one of my life's motto, "there's no need to rush, we're all just waiting, waiting to die" from City and Color's "Waiting".

You all have a great coffee day. 

...

People still come to visit this blog, really? Thats very nice of youl. I'm gonna try to be more entertaining than this. Cheerios and marios.

Have a nice day. 

:)

It sometimes easy, at times so difficult, to hide vulnerableness.

I am, on the outside and inside, a joyful soul. When I laugh, I laugh my hardest, that is the only way to go for me. Laughter is by far the best of everything; the best entertainer, the best medicine, the best mask, the best way to shed a tear, the best way to put a smile on a crying face. :( 

If I have the power to laugh, and make the others around me laugh, then why don't I share it? If I have plenty of joy to share, then why not? Laughing alone is equals to not laughing at all. And laughing with your best of friends beats winning a lottery.

But if only sorrow and sadness, and faaking pek chekness are as easily shared as laughter, then I guess life would be a tinsy bit better. It is suffocating.

Ask me how I was yesterday; I'd tell you I was fine. Ask me how I am today; I will always be fine. But know that I am sometimes lying to you.

"Pai Seh nia", said Jenn.

I am not in a farny mood to write humor, I want to try to get this ugly fugly thoughts out of my head, but I cannot. But why bising so banyak, because in the end, I always end up writing something stupid, that tries to be farny, but this time, I am typing with a face quite straight.

Today was quite a day. I think I managed to pull my friends (not yet all of them) to the almost-ultimate-embarassment.

Cheah, Tee Xin and myself slept over at Jennifer's.

Cheah was already complaining that she was very sleepy since 12am. @1am, she was still saying that she was sleepy. @2am, still complaining. @3am, she says she wants to sleep already. @3:30am, she jemput us to sleep with her. @4am, she complained that her eyes were really heavy. and she wants to sleep. @4:30am, she was in the kitchen washing eggs. @5am, she was eating maggi curry with egg. @6am, lying down on the bed, she was. said that she has to sleep even for a bit, because apparently, she has been awake since 8am, the previous sunrise.

Jennifer? @12:15am: "wah, very hot ah my house". @12:30am: "omggggg, so hot. so hip. you all not hot one meh?" @1.00am: "so hot." @2am: "we just sleep on the floor la. more shi fook." @3am: "yo, hot lo." (fidgeting like a lizard drying up) @4am: walking about the house. @4.30am: cooking maggi curry for a crowd. @5am: eating maggi curry with egg (with egg SHELLS WASHED) @5.30am: "omg, its so hot, eyer, Jane, I see with the blanket, I hot for you. So hot I cannot sleep, I think this is one of the factor that I cannot sleep at night". @5:45am: "I think I cannot sleep already la". @6am: -sda- 
(Jennifer ini memang perasan habis, nak berlagak badan langsing, ghairah tak pasal-pasal, yang semalaman menjerit yang dirinya hot.)

Tee Xin; @12:00am: pretend to read newspaper. @1:00am: staring at me and Cheah. @2:00am: pretending to take picture of us lying down on the floor. must be some keng kuai there. @3:00am: mabuk tidur. @4:00am: mabuk tidur. @4.30am: tyring to open the rempah packet for maggi curry. poor effort. @5:00am: eating maggi curry. @5.30am: falling in and out of sleep. (because Cheah keep kacauing her). @6:00am: fully loaded on pigciation.

@11:00am; after a very tireless effort to wake Cheah and Jennifer up, they finally surrendered to my consistency. after breakfast, after the morning gossip, I had decided for everyone that we were going to go out for a karaoke session as we were, meaning, as what we wore to sleep the last night, and as how we looked. Jennifer attempted a few times to change, but we guarded her well. But I fell nose down doing so. Pain.

@4:30pm; we finished our karaoke session, in our pajamas and we were hungewwwy! Also because, another friend, Aurora Lim, aka Siew Yong complained that she needed to eat right away, so we went to Taiping Sentral for McDonalds. :) Cheah walked about Sentral bare footed. Oh, the public attention.

And thanks to Jennifer, she had to wear a Convent tshirt, with a BIG BUTT Convent logo on it.

No photos. But I will have it.

Okla.